1. |
400 [Instrumental]
02:41
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i was just a little wrong, i was just too literal\
i wondered on every day how it all became metaphysical
my head is fossilized now
my head has decomposed now
at last aligned and i digressed from matters wasted, its a weakness
dry, subtle eyes, hopeless lies comes quick
with an hourglass, time passes, clocks tick, im sick
red eyed, i’ll try to be better whatever
write a letter when i’m down under the weather
dull and crossboned, null in the crossfire
this kind of hope wont expire
blind recherché in harmony
center of humdrumity
free from the memory, juxtapositive
and then we’ll see
sharp brained blood stain, cut up duration
let down with high expectations
its known by little and bought by one
but someone else could and they have done
whereuntil do we owe the sun
where without heart we love the unknown
its beginning to be a fixation
id hate to be blinded by my own lesser half
i got the right mind the right time
but i find it difficult to be
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2. |
Blank [Instrumental]
02:28
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it’s never a versitile thing it’s seems
when april comes and goes in spring, again
and somehow summer seems to suck the life from me down there with forgotten dreams and blank slates
when is a blank slate a restart?
so startled by the idea of redemption art
aren’t you
spoken to
i’m with you
blank from the start from the top to the bottom its been said once again there is
light, there is dark, there is void where there shouldn’t be space in between
our yesterday, what was said on that day, there’s a mess
unfolding from the loneliest memories kept under oath, unsure of, myself again, and again
it’s like holding my head underwater for a while
until my eyes begin to see the sea like nothing else ive ever seen
or ever dreamed of being close to me
and then my two shaking hands unwrap the warped confusion to look inside
the struggle of loving the bus stop
is leaving when its time to get up
and losing what you shouldnt miss
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3. |
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death of creation, gone with the wind, i’ve been far too certain there’s no way to win a heart
on the surface, borderline inside
shell forgiven but there’s so much to hide
beyond the bed of grieving here
no way to change the meaning here
im lost in honesty, somewhere near the end, where i’ll send you away
or wait another day
until the same mistake takes me up and drags me down to where i’ll never see the
light this day is one that i will think about all the time.
the feeling unlike that of any other kind
why the thought is spoken twice, its not a borderline
but one way you and i will be spending our time
this force left untouched guarded by words
how will we resurface if we should drown out the hurt
when the end comes without compromise
mortal twist to an immortal demise
the aconite im thinking of
the poisonous, the death of love
the unrequited solitude i find, infecting my spine
like every other time
i go back again, again, til i forget the difference between darkness and the light
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4. |
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from which standpoint do you stand now
at which point will you tell me how
we got so no youre different now
at the top of it, from the bottom, no since this autumn
at the crossroads you cross my mind
and on this roads where i fall behind
takes so much just for you to smile
what a sad guy, yeah you’ve been a face pincher since last winter
its possible that weve cooked under the sun
its plausible that you’re the son of a gun
maybe its just a phase, a little smudge on our hearts that we can erase, maybe its the timing, or maybe were really out of place
real love is so hard to find
chances are there's someone better
youth is when we fall behind
aging just means getting sicker
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5. |
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are dreams what we rely on anymore
is life another dream, is it all as it seems
or is this life just a lie we vouch for
where kindness is a clarity and decency’s a charity
saving grace got nothin on death
when you wake up, why, the why’s making a mess
the misery you live for, the gods that you all sing for
hard to fraction the harsh reaction, the margin of our own collapse when we're blessed with misery, death, or misery
scared of failing
of falling, the avalanche
set to crawling, we’re all on fours
this debt, the mourning, the heartsickness
we live for, we live for
game, we’re playing
so tainted, the poison
made to waste away our dreams
it’s sad, it’s heartless, it’s what we’ve come to
fight for, we’re done for
every day this week totally sucked
afternoon flyby yeah i messed up
little complications come to serve me right
when i spend all my time just thinking its fine
when in every actuality life’s crazy
maybe, leafing through the days i think i’ve just been a little bit lazy
bitcrushed human
little unhuman
little out of touch and a little untrue
but this part of me’s a bit hard to see when i’m always acting like i got everything
under control, and this much you know
that maybe it’s because i’m just tired of the same old
the same old
the death toll
theres a hope our eyes, cuz we do try
but we cant tell the way things are gonna be
guess im not the only one exploiting the temptation
guess you are the only one with faulty allegations
for all i know and for all i dont
for all i will and for all i wont
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6. |
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something passed me by
a little white lie
a variation on life
the fifth/last dimension
we made fire
the first line
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7. |
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poison of the mind takes over
shines in the light, your god hears the plight but you congregate with the sound
converted in time wishing for whats sublime
and you keep scraps in your head
until its left it for dead
night belladonna
a knife to your honesty
cant turn your back on a bleeding heart
what was life like before
what will be like soon
slight by night time, changing life slowly
the only words left are spoken in vain
im bringing this back for the year to come, the year i lose
faint heart take it all, take it all away
the one thing that i have kept dearly
the memory preserved way down, way deep
supposedly what’s keeping me above dark water
metanoia may be morbid for me
it's some greedy world who gets by on its own
and consanguinity will burn the throne down
some maybe believe that they need hospitality from a god
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8. |
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oh when have i been different since i've been this
oh how could this be a dream, as you'd wish for me
i didn't want to say
all that i had to say
my love does complicate
while your love's just the same
how did it turn on you
how am i about you
how am i now when you've dissected me can't you see
since then i have been different, you made it different
now that my hearts out there
i wish my heart wasnt out there
i'll hide my heart instead
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9. |
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sub-conscious self-consciousness
unconscious self-confidence
unloved in the thick of this
no love, just the thought of this
it comes to us
and it sticks with us
and grows within us
til it breaks us
and it leaves us with a sentiment
we were never meant
to let manifest in us
i don't need attention
i don't want to be distorted again
i don't need your attention
i just don't want to be distorted again
letting go in life
giving up on love
its easy to find your mind
detached from the world
the indignant pigment found around the ground i know
its imbedded in the soil
its down deep in my soul
im hooked on bad principles
philosophical, a bit methodical
and i try to lean away from
the way i take away from this
habits get a hold of me and i lose half of who i used to be
to be, to be free of envy
reverse astronomy, backwards physics
optimists and lovers turned objective cynics
defiled by time, the righter rhyme
draped over hearts and blocked-up minds
even this we knew would end someday
even lies would resolve the destruction at bay
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10. |
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sifting through the flaws, breaking my own laws
somehow made it through what i thought a grand pause
artifacts below, messin with the flow of normal life, its hard to find a day when i can be alright
cant remember a single year where i evaded it all
theres some sublevel wishing for flight or a fall
can you hear my heart, my heart
stutterin cuz its breakin apart
this series of woes, like a drug tipped dart
might i go by once unscathed, perceptions are so skewed when you livin your life sideways
but i cant come up for air
its a truth that ive prepared, dont you dare
i cannot bear to see the nightshade hangin there
aconite, belladonna, paint the sky if you wanna
will it die, can it wither, (my own hand pulls the trigger/from my hands start the ticker)
red on white, blood on paper, paint chipped doors, holy water
i am gone but im hopin i can live through the poison
grievances array, torture tba
sometimes metaphysical but always in the game
my better judgement fails, this deadly curse prevails
rest assured, im never sure and my rest is assailed
traumatizing, its depth-defying, it blurs reality and kicks the guidelines.
hole in your heart, cant wait to start, fear is the devil but hope is a new art
can you feel the pain the pain
settling in, the bite, wolfs bane
sinking in to whats already infesting your brain
dear you’ve got the wrong idea, no holding back, what i seem to take from minor things, my own heart is blamed for the sting
and im hiding under oath
tying up the ropes, dont you know
its delirium caused by the deadliest
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11. |
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she dug a hole past her destination after observing the schism
the witness was then accused of achromatism
messed up isnt it
washed up, misery
miracle, let up
said you’d never leave, up
did u even need us
could u at least grieve us
selfish to be this fine
sell your soul to be fine
sell your cold heart right
you can make it all right
just by giving up
miracle, let up
messed up isnt it
best us, didnt it
said you’d never leave us
could u at least grieve us
i think that this time we’ll stick together
cuz the next time i might be out the way
i hope my heart can keep it together
i hope that this time we’ll be okay
what you’ve given me’s mystification
my insides have folded inward
oh with all this heart dilation
i think that i’ll die pretty soon
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12. |
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save your quips for someone who gets them
save your lies for the ones who cant detect them
i see right through you
i see right through it all
no need to be clever in your answer
no need to be that smart
i need a little consolation
when everything falls apart
rebound yeah quick recovery
good thing you know how to lie
good thing im so receptive
its obviously in your eyes
when one thing is another
when i cannot find the truth
yeah i get a little angry
yeah nothing gets past you
it's more difficult now, i swear
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13. |
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all i need
is a dark blue sky
where the sun can’t burn my skin and dry my eyes
oh the restless days I’ve spent sitting inside waiting for midnight to draw me in and let me know tomorrow'll be bright
no the clouds won’t close me in ill be just fine
this is not the end
i could not condemn
theres no bleeding heart buried in me im fine now
this could be the end
take me as i am
i confess ive found myself out of time
the loving light's left me alright
take a world
and forget the universe
this is how we act when we forget the future
unless we should say sorry, please forgive me for destroying myself im used to it by now
its not the end its never the end i can’t condemn but it was done by then
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14. |
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may we all find relief in the end
it was done by then
may we all find a place to begin
it was done by then
and we scraped along the surface
until we stripped it to its core
and we danced around the fire
that would burn us to the floor
what id give for a right answer
could i live being far gone
its been the same old story
we’re just telling it wrong
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